Coming to terms with using and relying on antidepressants …

I initially had a lot of shame surrounding taking a pill to stay alive, feeling weak that if I didn’t take it I would likely try and kill myself again. Eventually I the shame surrounding my depression dissipated and I was able to enjoy the effects of the antidepressant and simply be grateful that we live in the era where this technology exists; where I can live a relatively normal life with significantly better mental health. 

Of course no medication is perfect, mine does come with a side of brain fog and I often wonder what life would be like if I could harness my mind at its sharpest. Maybe one day I will be able to transition to a different medication or come off them entirely but for now I’m just glad they work for me.

The work itself is very literal, the body is able to recline into a pill shaped beanbag. The feelings that come with interacting with the work reference the feelings the pills are able to provide for me, relaxation, comfort, safety.

It’s also just kind of a fun beanbag.
I feel as though the comical size and cartoon like colours give the work a sense of humour.
The recognisable shape allows the audience to connect with the subject immediately.
And the soft texture juxtaposes expectation, reading like a punchline. 

I encourage audiences to take whatever message to connect with from this work, and not to place too much weight on the story that brought it into existence as each individual experience with a sculpture is what gives it a life outside itself/gives it meaning/gives it success.